Tuesday, March 4, 2014



 Today is the last day of "nothing will ever be the same again"....................

I got up and went through all the motions: shower, chatting with Nikki, try to wake kids, wash hair, try again to wake kids, unload dishwasher, kids finally get up (and shower, eat, brush teeth put clothes on), visit from nurse for my jab, get out the door and into the car. We were only 15 minutes later than usual but everyone got to school on time.

Home again and its a bit of time for breakfast before I get back in the car and get to experience morning rush hour in Stockholm. (not bad compared to the Long Island Expressway...) Trying to find a parking spot near my hairdresser is never easy. I finally find one about 3 blocks away. I pay for on street parking the whole day to be prepared. Then, I look at the parking sign regulations.........on that particular street there is no parking on Tuesdays between 9 am and 4 pm for street cleaning. Great that I could make a donation to the parking company. Wasn't that nice of me? Frustrated I drove one more block to the undergound garage and paid again. Lucky me.

The walk to the world's best Hair Dressers made me a little nervous of how I was going to be received and what I was going to say. I did not have a time booked, but I have been a customer for 18 years and was confident that my WAR PAINT transformation would happen sometime today. My hair place is called SOUL and it is run by two fantastic people called Sophie and Ulrica. There is always a great environment there and always something going on. (everyday goings on would lend themselves to a sitcom) I love it.

World's best hairdressers.

I came in a bit before opening time and Sophie was there and all of a sudden I teared up and couldn't talk. Now it was real. I finally managed to get it out of me and waited for Ulrica to come so that she could fit my haircut in sometime during the day. I had planned on sitting there all day if I needed to.

Ulrica arrived and was a hero when she made time for me and made it look so good. It was hard to see the hair getting cut and becoming shorter and shorter, it was made worse because I didn't have my glasses on. I felt taken care of and cared for and I knew that was how I would feel being there. It was comforting. Both Sophie and Ulrica are AWESOME. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TODAY.

A final wash of that hair.....
Ulrica crafting her handiwork on me.

Hair cut was done just in time to call Mia and ask about lunch. I was in luck because it wasn't just Mia and but also Anna K. We ate and laughed and talked and laughed and talked and then we drank some tea and laughed again. JUST WHAT I NEEDED. LOVED.

Anna, me and Mia

Now I am prepared for the battle of my life. 

The boys all think my hair looks good. Kevin can't wait to get his head shaved when it is time for me to shave my head. He is amazing.

Peter is on his way home from London. He will be with me tomorrow when we meet the DOCTOR for the real and final diagnosis with what stage of cancer and exactly what type of agressive non-hodgkins lymphoma that I have and how it will be treated.

Many questions to prepare tonight and I look forward to the answers with a bit (OK, a lot) of trepidation. Once armed with those answers I will make myself ready for the challenge of Thursday's chemo.

Katy Perry's song Roar:
I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
'Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than a lion
'Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar

Watch out CANCER here I come.


  1. Love the selfie...which in Maltese is a stessu...add that to your list of Maltese words for the day ;) xxx

    1. Jiena l-habib tieghek. You are awesome.

  2. Anonymous4/3/14

    You look fierce! Praying for a restful night and peace through the day tomorrow. Petra J

  3. Hej Teresa! Jag kan knappt läsa utan att gråta.
    Jag vet att det kommer gå jättebra för dig imorgon! Massor av kramar Jenny

  4. Erika Arenborn4/3/14

    You look really cool in your new hairstyle! Will be thinking of you guys tomorrow. Take care and big hugs!

  5. Anonymous4/3/14

    Teresa, we really are in awe of your strength in facing this journey & your capacity to journal everything. Truly AWESOME. Kick ass tomorrow!!! Deb & Graham

  6. Kram Teresa! Tänker och känner med dig inorgon��

  7. Anonymous4/3/14

    Sending positive thoughts and strength for tomorrow. Great new look! ROAR! xoxo Mary Waghorne

    1. I feel the strength you are sending. I am ready for battle. HUGS

  8. Teresa, du kommer BESEGRA detta, hur än morgondagen blir. Du är en STARK kvinna och framförallt du är BRAVE. Finns inga tvivel alls.
    Massor av Värmländska styrkekramar till dig <3

  9. Anonymous4/3/14

    We can hear you ROAR all the way from South Carolina. Keep it up.

  10. Anonymous5/3/14

    Hej Teresa!
    Tänker på dig och hoppas det gått bra idag och att du fått svar på alla dina frågor.
    Många styrkekramar

    1. Hej Christel, Tack och jag ser fram emot alla svar på mina frågor. KRAM

  11. Hi Teresa! Wow! haven't seen you with your hair so short since you got the Dorothy Hammill haircut, or the picture of you on the Italian Yatch when you did the around the world leg from malta to Gibralta. I just found that photo of you! you look great - were you thinking of going just a little auburn?

    I look forward evreyday to hearing how you are doing. If only you could bottle up your courage and positive thinking and action and help others. you have these qualities in abundance. Love you so much. Just one week before we arrive. MUM
    PS did you figure out what FUF meant? Love, Mum and dad

  12. Mom and Dad, I think I got all my strength and wit from the two of you. Looking forward to your visit to Stockholm soon. (no idea what FUF means and you do not want to see my suggestions.....)