Bye Bye 2014

2014.12.31

New Year's Eve

365 days ago, we lived in Sweden and celebrated with dear friends, watched the fireworks in our neighborhood and face timed with my parents at midnight. It was to be a year of many exciting things to come - 2014.

January 2014

• Taught Lego classes and held Lego Birthday Parties, 
• Cleaned out house to style it and put it on the market, 
• 31st - Peter and I to London so he could start new job

 

February

• 15th - discovered large mass on my neck
• 15th -House offer accepted and contracts signed
• 15th - spent 8 hours in the ER with no results
• 17th - headed to a private doctor and got the ball rolling with tests to get an answer
• 20th - Mia went with me to demand the results - IN SHOCK as it is non-hodgkins lymphoma DLCBL. 
• Life is forever changed
• 21st - trip to Gran Canaries cancelled

Smiling with cancer bulging from my neck.

March

• 10th -CHEMO R-CHOP #1
• 17th -Parents arrive to help out
• Haircuts (heads shaved - all of us)
• 25th -CHEMO #2

Chemo #1

Chemo #2

April 

• 1st- Mom and Dad back to NY
• 9th - CHEMO #3
• 10th - Marcus turns 14.
• Quick trip to London to check out houses.
• 23rd - CHEMO #4
• 29th - I turn 49. Yippie! (bald and 49 what more can someone ask for?)

May

• 3rd- my sister Kris arrives for one week visit
• 5th - toenail removed due to infection, chemo delayed a week
• 5th - afternoon trip to ER with Eric - admitted to intensive care unit for DIABETES.
• 14th - CHEMO #5
• 16th - Nicole and Jackson arrive for one week visit
• 28th - CHEMO #6
• 29th - MOVERS PACK UP THE HOUSE
• 30th - MOVERS PACK UP THE HOUSE

June

• 2nd - House contracts exchanged.
• 13th - last days of school for the boys
• 16th- CAT and PET scan for me
• 19th - doctor visit to hear the results: REMISSION
• 21st - Celebrate Midsommar in Sweden
• 22nd - Trip to America to celebrate my parents 50th Wedding Anniversary

Kevin's last American Fottball Game

July

• 1st- Eric turned 11
• Visited Charlotte-Bluffton-St. Augustine-Ft. Lauderdale-Key West-Charlotte
• 14th - Back to Sweden
• 25th - London Exploration

July 8 (our 19th wedding anniversary) Key West

August

• My hair is growing back
• Kevin turns 17
• Filmaking camp for Kevin
• Drama camp for Marcus
• Boys start new school 

Hair on August 1st

Sending Sophie to London

September

• Visit Nikki in Malta
• Doctor visit in Sweden - 3 MONTHS ALL CLEAR 
• 25th - Personal shopping day. A great day!
• Met and made many new friends here in London
• Eric starts karate, Marcus starts drama classes, Kevin starts Parkour

  

October

• 3rd - Start at G14 with my personal trainer, Ben
• Saw Canterbury Cathedral and Whitsable Beach
• Mia and her family visit us
• NFL games in London. FUN FUN FUN

November

• Girls Weekend in Lisbon
• 14 workouts in Gym with cardio and strength training

Blood Red Seas- November 11th

Lisbon - Torre de Belem

December

• Christmas Fayre in Burnham-on-Crouch
• 16th - Mom and Dad arrive for a 3 week visit
• Art of the Brick Exhibit
• Christmas and New Year in London

Art of the Brick

Globe Theatre

The majority of these points above are positive, wouldn't you agree? 

It has been a long year and I feel like I lived every second of it in slow motion. Luckily my chemo brain forgets that fact sometimes and I can reflect on how blessed I am to have so many dear family members, great friends (new and old). I got to see so many things this year even though I was totally exhausted after chemo. I did most of these things at a much lower activity level and that is the new me.

My children have matured and tried many new things. My husband is happy with his Christmas presents.......as I am too. Just happy to be alive. YES, ALIVE. 

So happy to say goodbye to 2014. It was a bumpy ride but I came through on the other side and I have now taken control over my eating, exercising and I focus on living here and now. 

Battling cancer has changed me and I am focused on embracing that change. The cancer will not define who I am, I am more than just a survivor of cancer. I will live my life to the fullest and I am grateful that I can do that.

Tonight will be celebrated by eating well, enjoying dessert, watching the fireworks on TV and hugging the nearest and dearest that are gathered here. Sending big hugs to all the rest of you that have been a part of my life in 2014. 

Please feel free to comment below in the comment section.

I look forward to new adventures in 2015 with all of you. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

LOVED. GRATEFUL. 

KICKED CANCER'S ASS. LIVING LIFE. 

BE BRAVE. LOVE LIFE.

Hot and Sunny

2014.05.25

SUNDAY

Started the day off early. It should be a day of rest. I try. I really try to rest. but so much to do and so little time left.

I started with a drive to the airport to drop Nicole and Jackson off at 8 am. Then on the way home I found a street sign of Jackson's favorite word. I had to stop and take a picture. It means speed bump but sounds really funny in English.

Back home again and I did a little sorting before the move. Then it was time to eat lunch and relax a little before Kevins's American Football game at 1 pm. Go Täby Flyers U17. They won over Solna Chiefs and Kevin played a good game today. It was a hot day on the field and in the stands. It is always a great environment with the other parents as we cheer on our sons.

After they won they do the wave for all of us and then we headed home. I was tired from the sun even though I had some sunscreen on my bald head. Peter made dinner and we ate. Everyone was hungry. After dinner I made a stab at organizing some stuff in each of the rooms. We now have two days to get ready before chemo and then the movers. (I am so going to relax next weekend.......)

I face-timed with Nicole and Jackson from the Chicago airport. They had arrived on their first leg of the journey. Miss them already. Then Marie face-timed me from the Carolina Mountains and we chatted a while. I really do like the facetime aspect, especially when the connection is great.

Side effects of cancer are different for each person. The chemo drugs are quite strong and the other pills that try and counter the side effects are really not good for the body and also can cause long term problems. For me they have been mild in most cases. Hard brittle toe and finger nails, mouth sores, loss of hair in most places, fatigue, loss of toe nail, blurry vision and dry eyes at times, can't wear contact lenses, sensitive to light, grouchy, irritable - these are mine that I live with each day. Some of these side effects will never go away and others will take up to a year to disappear.

It is amazing what we put our bodies through just to live. We humans are amazing!!

My tired self is going to go to sleep so I can leave good blood work tomorrow.

LOVED. GRATEFUL. KICKING THE CANCER IN THE ASS. FAMILY. FRIENDS. INDOMITABLE HUMAN SPIRIT. 

May Bonfire.

2014.04.30

Tired this morning upon waking up. But managed to drag this old body out of the bed and out with the dog. Back inside after a short walk I got the kids up and took my pills and my shot.

Only my two oldest had school today so getting them off to school was not a problem.

I ate some breakfast and then the phone rang. It was Ulrica, the 2nd grade teacher from Campus Manilla where I work. I was on speakerphone and the whole class sang Happy Birthday to me and told me what time the grilling started today so I could come and visit them. Wow, tears came to my eyes during their thoughtful rendition of the song.

I was tired so I took a 1,5 hour nap before it was time to drive into town to meet my students at school. Today they were having a grill day for lunch with some outside games and this makes it easier for me to hang out with them.

My youngest son followed along for the day. We arrived at the campus and walked into the 2nd grade classroom. All the kids were happy to see me. It was awesome to see all of their smiling faces again. I spent the next three hours talking to and playing with the kids from kindergarten to third grade. One of the cutest moments was when I joined the first grade class and they asked why do you have that hat on? I said "I don't have any hair under it. Do you want to see it?" They shouted "yes". I took off the hat and they all wanted to touch my head. So I bent my head over and had 24 different hands rub it....is that good luck for them or me? Adorable. After three fun filled hours it was time to head home. Hugs galore from all the kids. LOVED. MISS THEM TERRIBLY.

The traffic was terrible to get home as it is the first day of a 4 day weekend. I was tired when I got home. I set my alarm and slept 1,5 hours so I could have enough strength for dinner at Stina's house and the neighborhood bonfire and fireworks later on in the evening. Awesome to sleep.

It was 6 p.m. and we walked over to Stina's house. I have boys, she has boys and there were a few friends there too. So the house was filled with boys - good thing they were on the trampoline before dinner and worked out some of their energy. Great dinner and company as usual. Thanks Stina and Alex.

We walked to the bonfire area. The children were lining up a bit away so they could each carry a lit torch to throw on the fire after the procession. It is always kind of cool to watch the procession and then how the kids form a ring around the huge pile of twigs and branches and throw the torches on it. As it quickly flames up, we are all backing away from the heat. As the fire dies out -- the fireworks start. They are always enjoyable to watch. The whole bonfire evening is a fun way to welcome in Spring and to see the neighbors. I might just miss that aspect of Sweden when we move.

Of course, it was really cold tonight and started to rain just before we got home. That is typical Swedish weather - they are even predicting snow for tomorrow-----hahhahaha. It wouldn't surprise me.

Tomorrow will be a day of rest. I promise to myself to try that for a whole day. It just might work.

LOVED. GRATEFUL. BONFIRE. HAPPY STUDENTS. HUGS. KICKING CANCER'S ASS.

LAB RESULTS ++++++++

2014.04.07

Got up to get the dog out for a walk, the kids up for school and me ready for the day. All went pretty well.

I dropped off the youngest at school and headed to the lab to leave some of my blood. I ended up waiting 20 minutes among "sick" people that were coughing - a little stressful. When I finally got in, the nurse said that next time I could tell them and they would take me sooner so I wouldn't have to wait amongst all the germs because of my exposed immune system

Home again and needed to spend the next few hours figuring out which bank in the UK is going to give us the best mortgage rates. Technology made it sort of easy by sending emails to the different contacts and them calling me. Some very nice and promising conversations today. Those darn magpies are now building a nest in a different part of the tree. Those persistent buggers.

My doctor's appointment was at 2 p.m.  The rainy weather means everyone drives slower. Then the usual parking garage was full so I had to drive around to the other parking garage and squeeze into the spot. I made it on time to the appointment.

It was Doctor Maria that came and called me in for the appointment. She said "I remember you" OF COURSE she did. She is the doctor that started to give me the bone marrow biopsy needle and couldn't succeed and had to call in OLGA. I told her thanks for giving me two for the price of one. She said she had never experienced that before she met me. I have the hardest bones she has ever seen.

The visit went well. She was a little concerned that I was having shortness of breath sometimes and checked me to make sure that she couldn't see any signs of clotting or swelling in my extremities. Everything looked good. My blood values were also very good. YEAH. That made me happy as the trip to London was ok. I took all the right precautions with the face mask and taxis when needed but I won't risk going again until the chemo is done in May.

Home again and tried to take a little nap but of course the phone rings. It was the realtor from the house that we have put an offer in on. YES. the offer was accepted. Today is my lucky day. I might have to go out and buy a lottery ticket. Peter was very happy.

Peter's motto.

The kids and I ate a simple dinner and then I took a walk with the dog to get some fresh air. I checked in on FB and mail and get energy from all my friends that are thinking about me and showing it. GRATEFUL.

I have a lot to look forward to but I am continuing my main focus on KICKING CANCER'S ASS. That is my #1 priority.  HAPPY.

LOVED. GRATEFUL. HAPPY. HOUSE. BLOOD. KICKING CANCER'S ASS. LAUGH. FRIENDS. LAUGH.