Fatigue, frustration and looking to the future

It has been a month since I last updated. I have thought many times to write and update but haven't had the strength.

It has just been too much going on. We traveled. We packed. We unpacked (only a little bit). We are trying to get acclimated.

All of these activities have been challenging for me as the side effects are really taking a toll on me and my body.

SIDE EFFECTS: Fingernails ruined, toenails ruined, every joint aches, tired, risk of infection, no or limited feelings in the hands and feet. I feel like I am 10 years older (not more mature though).

Just cause the doctor says the cancer is gone doesn't mean everything is like it was before.

YES, HAPPY TO BE ALIVE. My hair is growing back!!!!!!

I see the new surroundings with wonderous eyes. I appreciate each and every moment especially when I am laughing with family or friends. I am getting some things done each day.

BUT, most of the time I am tired and I try to ignore it so that I can make everything like it was before. It is to no avail. I get up from the chair or bed and it hurts when I walk. I have worn open toed shoes since May 5th. My hips and legs are tired and I think of Tim Conway as I shuffle to the next room.

My brain is still a bit slow. The times when it feels normal is when it is frustrating to not be up to speed already.

I have come to grips with it by doing as much as I can before I feel tired. I focus on the important things to do each day and try and manage that. I am forcing myself to be happy with the present status quo.

The kids start a new school next week. It will be a lot of new impressions and friends and people to meet. It will also give me time to rest ......during the day. (HOPEFULLY)

Things will get done eventually if they are important. My side effects should diminish with time.

I AM ALIVE. THE FUTURE IS LOOKING BRIGHT.

GRATEFUL. LOVED. FAMILY. FRIENDS. NEW BEGINNINGS.